Song of Songs

Song of Songs, or Song of Solomon is a book in the bible that is so explicit, young Jewish boys were not allowed to read it until they were determined to be of a certain responsible age. It not only wows with it’s poetic imagery and it’s erotic setting, but it captures a love that is rapturous, as God desires monogamy in marriage to be. Finally, it is a metaphor of the kind of intimacy in prayer that is desired by the Lord for His people, and a precursor to the union of Jesus the bridegroom with His Bride, the church.

Several of the questions that I’ve received through the years have to do with the sexual activity that the Bible refers to. So I read through the Bible’s most metaphorical and explicit book on sexuality, and I have no doubt that after reading it, you’ll discard ANY notion that sex within marriage is designed to be dull or boring. Here’s how another pastor puts it:

The Song of Songs gives great liberty to sexual freedom and the full use of all five senses.
1. kissing (SOS 1:2)
2. oral/fellatio – her initiative (SOS 2:3)
3. manual stimulation – her invitation (SOS 2:6)
4. petting – his initiative (SOS 4:5)
5. oral/cunnilingus – his initiative (SOS 4:12-5:1)
6. striptease – (SOS 6:13b-7:9)
7. new places, positions, etc. including outdoors – her initiative (SOS 7:11-13)

As long as both participants in the marriage bed are feeling comfortable and honored, then there is great freedom and enjoyment planned by the Lord there.

Is it hot in here? I’ll say: the last time I taught this material my Father in Law was in the front row! I had to tell him, “Randy, after 13 years of marriage and 2 kids, you need to know…I’ve been sleeping with your daughter!” It just felt good to get that off my chest.

Remember, there are three types of sex for married couples:
1. Practice. Talking, communicating, discovering what sorts of things that both of you enjoy together.
2. Maintenance. This is due to high levels of exhaustion, and it’s sort of the minimum requirement necessary. Many couples live here, and it’s one of the reasons why the spark isn’t sparking like it used to.
3. Feasting. This is when you prioritize date nights, weekends away, and even vacations together without the kiddos. Again, for a Biblical example of feasting, read through Song of Solomon together, by yourselves, listening to your favorite romantic tunes with the fire roaring and the kids at grandma’s house for the night.